“I probably do have an obsessive personality, but striving for perfection has served me well.”~ Tom Ford

I love routines. Why? Because I have OCD. I’m pretty sure a majority of people know the meaning of OCD. For those who may not, the dictionary definition states that Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is an anxiety disorder characterized by recurrent obsessions or compulsions or both that cause significant distress, are time-consuming or interfere with normal daily functioning, and are recognized by the individual affected as excessive or unreasonable. In other words OCD is a mental disorder in which people have unwanted and repeated thoughts, feelings, ideas, sensations (obsessions), and behaviors that drive them to do something over and over (compulsions). When I was in law school, almost everyone I knew had some type of OCD. I’ve always known I have OCD based on routines I’m obsessed with.

Let me give some personal examples. Whenever my gas tank is half full, I start to get anxious. I get anxious/panic because to me, my brain processes my half full tank as an empty tank. Whenever I take a shower, I have to wipe down the bathroom walls because I hate to see dried water spots on the walls. I seriously cringe when I see dried water spots on bathroom walls. My husband looks at me funny when he sees me wiping down and sometimes he asks why I wipe down when he’s about to use the shower immediately I get out. He doesn’t understand it’s an obsession for me. Another obsession  is with my tissue paper which has to roll out in a particular direction. It’s sounds crazy writing about it, but it’s my reality. Almost all the time, I have a candle burning in my home because I get easily irritated with smells. I’m obsessed with anything clean. My cousin always teases me about how I scrub my stove top when and after I finish cooking. I clean as I cook. I don’t wait till I’m done cooking. I can’t help it, I can’t stop it. I feel weird if I do anything outside my compulsive obsessions.

Recently, my girlfriends (who I take as my sisters from another mother) and I had a girl’s night in and this OCD topic came up. I have a godson and I noticed he has some OCD traits. Although, while discussing, a friend said my godson is a germaphobe. A germaphobe is a person with an extreme fear of germs and an obsession with cleanliness. I see this in my godson. He is always very particular with his appearance, his room is always neatly tided and he knows when someone touches his bed or sits on the corner of his bed. He wants his bed forever free of wrinkles, always neatly made and nothing out of place. He won’t eat your food if he sees you talking while preparing the food. He always has a comb in his hand, and will comb his hair a million times during the day. I did a little research because to me the similarities between OCD and germaphobes are glaring and did find out that true germaphobes have OCD. The TV show Monk created a massive awareness about germaphobe and OCD and proved that even with his OCD Monk could still triumph at his job.

Another major obsession I have is my utter dislike for grainy particles on the floor. I hate the feel of sand, crumbled snacks and particles on my wooden floors. When my daughter crumbles a cracker or snack on the floor, I cringe. She’s four years old, but I think she’s beginning to understand my anxiety to have a grain-free floor. Once she spills her crackers or snacks on the floor, she’s very quick to say “I’ll get the broom mummy.” OCD has a close running mate Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD). The difference is OCD is an anxiety disorder while OCPD is a personality disorder. People with OCPD do not feel the need to perform ritualistic actions unlike people with OCD who live for ritualistic actions. OCD and OCPD are as different as they are similar. Similar because sometimes the characteristics of one flows into the other.

So, after all I’ve said and done, do you have OCD? Hey, I don’t want to be alone in this OCD confession booth. What’s your obsessive compulsion?