“Go ahead then. Might as well wipe your ass with a doomed office romance before you flush your career down the toilet. You know it’ll happen.”~ Claire Gillian

A friend of mine had a huge crush on a male colleague of ours. She made it known to the guy that she liked him. She would flirt with him, went out for happy hour with him and other co-workers, sent suggestive text messages, at one point even kissed him on the lips. With all she did to show her interest in him, and although he played along, he never asked her out. He never invited her to his place or suggested any meeting outside of the office. I’m not sure if he was just against office romance or not interested in a relationship, we’ll never know because he never took the bait to ask her out or date her.

To some people, office romance is a big no! For those who have some experience in office romance, the one major unspoken rule is to not date your boss. This is one of the quickest ways to really flush your career down the toilet. Apart from the very obvious reason of the relationship going south if things do not work out between you and your boss, remember you may also need your boss as a reference for your career later on down the line.  As much as people are against office romance, there are some who have found their soul mates right in the next cubicle. The most challenging part of an office romance will be initially keeping the relationship under wraps. When is the right time to let co-workers know you are dating a colleague? Sometimes, at the early stage, some people tend to lie about their relationship with their co-worker. I don’t think this is advisable as down the line when the relationship becomes open, it might be seen as a negative strike because you lied. You may not want to call a meeting to inform your co-workers of your relationship with a colleague but lying about such relationship is not advisable. Rather, lying low and keeping the relationship hush hush till well grounded is a better idea.

For couples involved in office romance when is the best time to let your co-workers know you’re dating a colleague? I would say it’s advisable to wait until the relationship is a little matured. This covers the couple just in case the relationship never really takes off, at least that can be your little secret that things didn’t work out. What if in the midst of you trying to keep it a secret the office gossip finds out and freely shares the news on your behalf? Your feelings at this moment will determine if your office romance will survive. If you feel embarrassed or ashamed, then you might just want an office fling. Additionally, when an office romance is ongoing, can you truly focus on work one hundred percent? Or do you tend to get distracted. For example, you see the office flirt constantly in the cubicle/office of the co-worker you’re dating. Can you really give your undivided attention to your work at such times? If you’re dating someone outside of your work, it’s easy to focus all your time and attention but if Mr. Hot Pants is right across from your cubicle or a few doors down, I wonder if productivity will take a little bite.

What about when the relationship goes sour between two co-workers? How does this affect not only the couple but other workers/staff? A break up is bad all by itself but a break up where you still get to be in each other’s faces for eight or more hours every week day? That takes a lot of maturity to handle.  Also, what happens if after the break up, one party gets a promotion and the other party has to report to the newly promoted party? I see a lot of disadvantages in office romance, but this doesn’t mean office romance always ends in a bad way. Another factor to consider when you’re in an office romance is harassment issues. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. A bad office romance break-up might lead to a negative personnel action taken against you.

An office romance might sound like a good idea and you might think it’s unavoidable, but when you look at all you stand to lose if the relationship goes sour, I think it’s better to romance you job duties during office hours and flame your love life after you clock out. Be wise whatever your decision and seriously weigh your options. Always have a plan just in case the relationship goes sour and you need to make a move.